Lessons of a Happy, Bored Mother

Years ago, I had the privilege of attending a 2-day course conducted by the Disney Company. It was about excellence in customer service. How apt it was, to have the happiest people in the world conduct this course for us.

A story that I remember to this day. It’s about how the staff in Disneyland, including the janitors, are always so happy. And their job was to make all the visitors happy.

Simple enough, isn’t it?

The trick was, the moment the staff put on their uniforms and step into Disneyland, they are “in character”. Everyone, from those in the shops, to those working at the rides to the actors who don the Mickey Mouse costume! They put on a show for the visitors.

That’s conditioning! Just like what the actors do on a stage.

Did you know that we do that too? Growing up, most of us would have, at one time or another, been told what the right behaviour was. It’s the decorum. Or sometimes, etiquette.

Over time, it becomes the way we are.

Does it surprise you then, that you wear a mask every day? Are you a different person at work and at home? Or do you need to put on a mask even when you are home?

When are you, you?

This is the whole purpose of this website: To unveil the real you. Especially if you have forgotten who you are.

As women, we are very adaptable. We change when our roles change. For me, the most drastic change happened when I became a mother. I no longer cared about myself and all attention went to the helpless little bundle of joy in my hands.

The thought in my head then went like this: “I’m a mother now and this precious baby is my pride and joy. I am not important any more. Nobody needs to look at me, just look at my baby.”

I am serious, that went on in my head!

I was a sloppy especially on weekends. I went for the most comfortable t-shirt and Bermuda shorts. I didn’t care about how I looked most of the time. Many people could not recognise me when I showed them photos from that time.

I remember I had settled then. “This is the way my life will be and I am ok with it.”

I was contented. I didn’t dare to ask if I was happy as I was afraid of the answer. So it didn’t matter. I had a happy life and that was enough. I had settled.

So I floated along in life. I wore a mask, I was a happy working mother. I had a 9-to-5 job that paid me. I went home to my children every day. I discharged my responsibilities in a trance. That went on for many years without me realising it.

Or so I thought.

Knowing what I know today, I can tell you that I could have experienced a lot more happiness. I want you to experience this great sense of joy that comes from within. When you are this happy, your children will benefit too.

You don’t have to settle less, you are worthy of all that is good. God wants the best for you. He wants you to be happy and fulfilled. Stop standing in your own way. Stretch out your hands to Him and receive!

With love and blessings

Break the Rules and Shine! Adeline Heng empowers women over 40 who look good outside, yet feel empty inside, to find herself and live her best life.